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The Newbie’s Guide to Dog Shows

The televised Westminster Dog Show garners fans from across the globe many of whom have never set foot in the show ring. Some of these unfortunates don’t even

have any canine company in their own home (poor souls) but are curious—hungry—to learn. As a veteran of way too many shows, I’ve listed some simple tips for maximizing your dog show experience.

1. Don’t be shy.

Breeders and handlers love talking about their breed of choice and will gladly share any insights on the pluses/minuses of a specific canine type. One exception: If someone is waiting to take her charge into the ring, cut him/her some slack. Nerves and the need to excel may be at play. Instead, amble into the grooming areas and watch these wizards as they transform every day pups into superstars. You may learn a few grooming tips for yourself as well.

2. Bring the kids (but keep the little devils under control). Dog shows are family friendly venues that can also be teaching tools. Respectful treatment of both humans and canines is a must. Manners count. Ask permission before petting/touching any dog, and do so palms up, to appear non-threatening. Many families use dog shows to familiarize themselves with breeds that might be a good fit for their home. Benched dog shows, often called a SPECTATOR’S DREAM are ideal because they require that the participants remain for the duration of the show in order to interact with the public. Unfortunately, they are few in number (only 6 in the US).

3. Do Your Homework As in all things, informed consumers score the best. Visit the AKC website at https://www.akc.org/ to brush up on the various dog breeds and groupings. It’s fun, informative and a great guide for narrowing down your search. For instance, if you prefer a member of the Terrier Group, you’ll find an array of choices. Be aware that these feisty fellows (and gals), were bred for specific purposes and tend to have energy and spunk to burn. Personally, I favor the large breeds as found among the Working and Herding groups. My special guy, (Grand Champion Lord Byron), is a Belgian Tervuren, a relatively rare breed in this country. I also nurse an abiding passion for those gentle giants Leonbergers (Working group), and Rhodesian Ridgebacks (Hound Group).

4. Be A Realist Don’t burnish your ego by settling on a “Macho” breed unless you are fully informed and EXPERIENCED enough to handle the dog. Similarly, if you are a couch potato, don’t fixate on an active breed (i.e., Border Collies and Australian Shepherds) that craves plenty of exercise. Consider members of the Toy group such as the loving King Charles Spaniel for your household.

5. Be A Fan Half the fun of attending a show is watching and cheering for your breed of choice. Both the handlers and the dogs appreciate the enthusiasm of their admirers.

6. Consider Rescue And Shelter Organizations Too Many wonderful, loving dogs are yearning for a home and are available from rescue groups and Animal shelters. Use the information you glean from dog shows to narrow down your search relative to breed type, size and disposition. For example, Labradors and Lab mixes, those genial ambassadors of dogdom are frequently available as are many other mixed-breed and purebred pups and older dogs. Decide which choice best fits your needs and family.

7. Appreciate Don’t ever lose your sense of wonder at the incredible array of canine brains and beauty on display at Dog Shows. Few experiences can elevate your spirits more easily. Celebrate the joy of sharing your life with these astounding creatures.

Arlene Kay (and AKC GC CH Lord Byron), will celebrate the release of DEATH by DOG SHOW, (Creature Comforts Mystery #1) from Kensington Books, in March 2019. Join in the fun.

                                                FACE TIME

Like many of you, each morning I watch the national news shows eager to assess those being interviewed. More often than not people who should know better perform dismally in the spotlight. Some are quite unforgettable—not in a good way. Until now, hedge fund huckster Martin Shkreli had my vote for insolence beyond the call of duty and against his own best interests. He shrugged off raising the price of a life-saving drug by 800% while displaying a patented sneer that was truly a work of art. Subsequent actions by the SEC and a command appearance before a Senate Sub-committee were probable by-products of that tour de force.

I was eager to hear the new editor-in-chief of COSMOPOLITAN magazine this morning on voting patterns of young women. MISTAKE! Joanna Coles out sneered Shkreli (credit the British accent), used unnecessarily vulgar language, and managed to achieve something that Vladimir Putin failed to do: annoy the usually unflappable Charlie Rose. This thoroughly unpleasant woman did her employer and herself a disservice. Her message—young women are seeking something new—was obscured by her bad behavior and repellent personality.

There are lessons to be learned from those who can relate to an audience and like it or not, authors must master public appearances. Some are naturally gifted in this area but there is still hope for those who are introverts. Consider the following:

1. Show your audience and moderator courtesy by listening to the question and answering it succinctly.
2. Don’t babble, bloviate, or bore your listeners.
3. Even if you are a curmudgeon, learn to FAKE IT. Be your self but be your BEST self.
4. Humor, particularly self-deprecating humor is always a crowd pleaser.
5. Remember that every appearance is an opportunity—for good or bad. Prospective readers or current fans will be influenced by your public persona.

Finally: with social media and the INTERNET things last forever. Use your time in the spotlight to advance your own interests.

                                                BEWARE THE GREEN-EYED VERB

Many people are beset by jealousy but writers, individuals who labor in splendid isolation without adequate recognition or compensation, are especially vulnerable to the slings and arrows of envy. Writing is a cruel mistress, the true La Belle Dame sans Merci, who frequently beguiles one with promises then casts him aside. The New York Times Book Review (1/31/16) notes the temptation to react to another’s good fortune—fawning reviews, sizable advances, burgeoning sales–by exercising the power of the green-eyed verb to savage competitors. We may all occasionally scratch our heads when some mediocre or poorly written novel scales the heights, but obsessing over the success of another is counterproductive. Far better to analyze why and profit from it.

Awards can indeed be popularity contests that are totally unrelated to content. Reviews may be subjective and sales reports can be manipulated. Taken together however they suggest a strategy that the savvy student of the game takes into account. Why bemoan your fate when you may have the power to change it?

Aligning oneself with supportive writing communities also helps. Sisters-in-Crime is one example of an organization that educates and encourages its members while focusing on skill building. It celebrates the success of crime writers and strives to share the wealth with all members. There are many other groups with a similar mission that can stimulate professional growth and combat writers’ angst.

If all else fails, the next time you peruse the NYTIMES best seller list keep one thing in mind: perhaps the writer in question is actually BETTER than you.

LITERARY LAMENT
A recent opinion piece in BOOKENDS, posed this question:Is self-loathing an occupational hazard for writers? I love George Orwell’s observation that for writers, “self-loathing and self-love are locked in a tight pro-creative embrace.”
In all candor, many of us in all professions suffer from periodic bouts of despair, wondering if we are good enough, personable enough or just plain tough enough to survive and flourish in our chosen field. For writers (actors,comedians, & even politicians),
our merits are too often weighed publicly and cruelly in the theater of the absurd, aka the Internet.Unfortunately any troll with a computer and a grievance can savage our work. Third parties can inflict the unkindest cut of all by simply ignoring or dismissing us. Oscar Wilde, who knew a thing or two about trauma, famously said. “All men kill the things they love..” Writers in particular often labor in splendid isolation, mired in our daunting sales figures,paltry advances and the perceived successes of less talented peers.
Reality check–it is far easier to give up, and “kill the things we love” by abandoning the struggle than to persevere and create a novel to be proud of.
By allowing self-loathing to triumph, writers squander the most precious gifts of all–talent and creativity. After each rebuff, I force myself back into the battlefield, girded for victory.Sometimes I sense the triumph of optimism over reality. Other times, I savor the sweet sweet scent of success.

REMEMBRANCE OF EASTERS PAST

In my youth Easter was a major event, less for its religious significance than for fashion impact. As devout Catholics, my parents insisted that their daughters enroll at parochial schools and participate in all the related rituals. Church attendance, particularly during Holy Week was mandatory—no excuses.

I really didn’t mind because despite a bowed head, genuflection and pious prayers, Easter was my puerile version of New York Fashion Week. In advance of the holiday, my mother, sister and I spent Saturdays scouring department stores for the perfect Easter outfit. To my father’s dismay, every year we required new dresses, coats, lingerie, gloves, shoes, purses and the crowning glory—an eye-popping, mouth dropping Easter bonnet! It was a unique time of female bonding, part of a world where men were denied access. My father’s job was to groan, fork over the cash to pay for our finery, and admire the results.

On Easter morning, we primped and pranced, positive that every eye in the church was glued to us. God forbid that foul weather required umbrellas or rain gear that might spoil our hair or mar our carefully constructed style.